blog post #4: brace yourselves

Hello – it’s me (I had to). I am alive. I am breathing. I am writing once again.

It’s been 9 months since I last wrote a blog post which is totally unacceptable! However, I am back with a post & hopefully there will be a lot more content coming soon! I hope you are all well & fed and getting through life tremendously.

Let’s start with the title of this post. Brace yourselves. Take it as you see it. I have no idea what i’m about to pour out – although I feel it’s going to be lengthy. So, get that cup of tea & that biscuit jar and sit down ready to fixate your eyes on your screen.

I started this blog at a time where I had little to no responsibilities. Fresh out of university and working in a retail job to tie me down, my flexibility was a dream. On the other hand, watching everybody around me find their pathway was slightly overwhelming and so I began the hunt for a full-time job.

I think it’s safe to say job hunting has to be one of the most nerve-wracking experiences in life. You apply. You wait anxiously for an e-mail/phone call. You get one or the other – sometimes both! You get shortlisted. You get an interview. Everything seems great until you get one more e-mail starting with the word ‘unfortunately‘. Need I go on?Nonetheless, I somehow managed to stumble my way across my first ‘big girl’ job. It was one of the most exciting things that had happened in a while. The thought of working in the city and living that fast-paced lifestyle was so liberating, I just could not wait to start.

9 months later here I am. It’s been a gruelling 9 months and I honestly didn’t think I would last this long, but I stand myself corrected and continue to get through my big girl job. I’ll be brutally honest with you now. It’s not the best. My whole fantasy of living that amazing lifestyle in the city was basically shattered within 48 hours of the job. It’s completely different to anything i’ve ever experienced in my life. It was a real shock to the system. It’s stressful but rewarding. Tiring but enlightening. Accelerating but stagnant.

I am grateful enough to know some of the most talented and wonderful human beings on the planet. Future lawyers, doctors, teachers, entrepreneurs. I am so immensely proud of every single one of them. However, I can’t help but feel slightly deflated each and everyday. I compare myself to almost everybody I know. Why were they able to find their niche? Why do they have that and I don’t? Why were they were able to achieve that and I couldn’t? What am I actually doing with my life? I’ll let you in on a secret – I had no idea what I wanted to do as a career after I left university. I’ll now let you in on an even bigger secret – I STILL DON’T. I’ve never been one of those individuals who has that ‘thing‘. You know, someone who’s known for something that defines them. And I can’t help but wonder when i’ll actually discover it? I constantly feel as though i’m struggling to survive in the big open ocean whilst others are sailing across to land. It can be so frustrating knowing you have so much to give but don’t know how to execute it properly or nobody is willing to acknowledge it.

(p.s for those who know me & are reading this I know you all work extremely hard and I am not denying any of your hardships <3)

Whilst writing this post, I went back to read my previous posts and I couldn’t help but feel angry at my present self. My 9 months ago self wrote a post all about self-love and how you should make every day count. It definitely hit home. I took a deep breath, paused and counted my blessings because I have achieved so much within these past 9 months. I am so much more confident. I am able to stand on my own two feet. I am finding out about myself more and more everyday.  Yes, life may be tough sometimes. But the truth of it is – if it were easy would it be any fun? Everybody has their own journey in life, no matter how tough it may be. What may seem extremely difficult for me could be the simplest matter to another. Just because i’m having a bad week does not mean I have a bad life (thank you xx). I am able to achieve anything. It’s time to shake the negativity off and get back to doing things that I love doing. Exploring, spending time with my family & friends and making wonderful memories!

It’s important to remember that everything happens for a reason and as difficult as it may be, I am on my own journey to finding my pathway. If you find yourself relating to something in this post, I hope you can find comfort & I encourage us to stay strong, have faith & remember that you can do anything!

S x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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blog post #3: Me, me, me!

Happy Sunday guys!

Personally, I love Sundays. You lie in. You have a great breakfast (although I have the same thing every single day. Yes. Every. Single. Day). Watch some good TV and cry at the fact the weekend went by oh so quickly. This week has been eventful & i’ve loved every single moment of it. I’ve caught up with friends, had some great laughs, had amazing food and even did some exploring! Phew, i’m tired just even thinking about it. Nonetheless, I am happy and content.

When 2017 began, I sat wondering how I was going to top the year that had just finished. 2016 was so good to me and I started to feel anxious thinking about what the next 12 months would bring. You see I do this a lot. I’m definitely a ‘worse case scenario’ kind of girl. However, as mentioned in my first blog post, I am determined to put an end to those thoughts and just go with the flow. I want to make every day count and live life to the fullest.

It’s time to focus on yourself. You are on this Earth for a reason. I am firm believer that we are all here for a purpose, and throughout our lifetimes we are searching for those reasons. I’ve always been told your 20’s are all about finding ‘yourself’ and for years and years I wondered what this meant. How can you possibly find yourself? Where are you likely to be found? I mean if anyone was going to look for me, the 2 clues they would get would be food & a bed. Just saying. However, as I get older i’m beginning to understand the true meaning behind this statement. When you’re younger, everything seems to matter on a higher scale. Life is too short to sit around and worry about things that won’t matter in 5 years time. Yes, some days you’ll feel like shit and won’t even want to leave your house. Some days you’ll look in the mirror and sigh at the reflection. But so what? It’s time to stop worrying about the small stuff.

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You are important and can take on anything! I hope you all have a successful week ahead!

S x

 

 

 

blog post#2: Hometown Glory

Ahh traffic jams, body odour and squashed trains. How I adore this city oh so very much.

Though I may be biased, London is truly one of the most magnificent cities in the world. Growing up, my parents always made sure we were occupied before they heard the dreaded words “i’m bored”. Therefore any chance we got, it was a day out in London exploring and taking embarrassing photos next to every monument/attraction possible. Having lived in London my whole life, I truly feel as though now I am at a stage where I truly appreciate the history and culture that surrounds me. It’s crazy how so many of these buildings have stood for years, and yet I am still constantly discovering new places. Almost everyday I find myself stopping to take a photo of something that I had never noticed before.

In this particular blogpost, I wanted to share some photos of how I would describe my perfect day in London.

 

  1. Selfridges.

I don’t think I will ever be able to express how content one department store can make me. I can spend hours in Selfridges, without looking at my phone or watch. The possibilities are endless. From gawping at the Accessories Hall (which has just been revamped!) to having my eyes fixated on every beauty item possible, I never find myself unhappy in Selfridges.

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2. Finding those perfect backgrounds.

If anybody knows me, they know marble is my weakness. There is something that is just so aesthetically pleasing about a marble background. Almost every single time I find one, I force the poor individual who for some reason decided to spend their day with me, to take that perfect shot. I mean what else are they for – right?  This marble background can be found in New Bond Street.

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3. FOOD.

I love food. So much so that I am always on the hunt for that amazing heart warming meal. This infamous yellow table & green cushioned sofa can only be found in one place. This next photo needs no further words.

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4. The icing on the cake. (in this case, the Nutella on the waffle).

I unfortunately inherited my sweet tooth from my mother, which does get me into trouble sometimes. But more often that not, my partner in crime never refuses to join me in indulging on a delicious treat. Soho has some of the most amazing dessert places, including Snowflake Gelato.

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All photos included in this blogpost are my own. Though I may take it for granted, there is something so bloody brilliant about London and I will continue on my exploring endeavours.

I hope you enjoyed this post & hope to see you soon!

S x

blog post #1: How do you work this thing?

Hello everyone. Welcome to thecrazystupidblog.com. A blog created by a 20-something year old girl living in London. This blog will not only be a source of therapy for me, but also a way of showing you what I get up to generally and how I like to waste my time and money. I like makeup, food, clothes & adventures. Exciting right? Okay I’m getting carried away, let’s rewind and I’ll tell you how this all came about.

After months of umming & aahing about the thought of starting a blog, I finally plucked up the courage to press enter and start this journey. You see, a lot of my decisions are based on this judgement game of going back and forth. Creating disastrous scenarios in my head such as starting this blog will only cause embarrassment & humiliation, or touching my face after holding that bus pole will surely cause a lifetime supply of acne. It even goes as far as getting on that train to Central London will somehow collide in the tunnel and I’ll lose my life. (Dramatic I know – you’ll get used to it).

However, as we continue well into 2017 (it unfortunately isn’t slowing down for anyone) I’ve somehow managed to convince myself to break out of this habit and just do things without over thinking. Yes I may not be used to doing them, but the more I try the easier they will become. I hope. I’ve learnt over the past few years, hesitation only restricts you from enjoying your life – which surely can’t be healthy? It makes sense in my head okay.

That being said, the aim for this blog is hopefully to post everything & anything I want. Things that may seem crazy or stupid to you, but meaningful & deep to me. Get it? I hope I don’t lose you along the way and you are able to stick with me. Let us all pray this is something I can actually achieve without giving up or forgetting about!

See you soon!

S x